that must suck when you're a woman and you're forced to take the first name "old man." if i were a woman and opted to marry such a conservative man, i'd choose one named something like "lindsay," "leslie," or "pat."
although bear-arms would look pretty kickass on him, i think it would be harder to hold a gun without opposable thumbs. but on the other hand (other paw?), he would have claws, which would be undeniably cool.